THE THINGS ABOUT I LIKE TO DO !
Dancing is the second thing that I like to do. Dance can make me relaxing. Every time, when I practice dance. It will bring me joy. In addition, It will let my body feel relaxed.Eating is the third thing that I like to do. Nowadays, more and more people like to eat. When you feel sad just eat desert. Forget your weight.just to eat. Eating will let you forget the sad, let you re-find the confidence and happiness.Eat also can increase the feelings between family members. As we all known, every festival, we all eat together with our family. Especially the Spring festival in China.Above all , These are three things that I like to do. I hope that three hobbies can continue. Let my life more exciting.
Hi, Lucy.Your paragraph is good.But here also have some problems. It's bad that you don not have underlined your topic sentence.But I think your paragraph has a good structure.I hope you continue to correct your paragraph, it will be better. Fighting!
ReplyDeleteOK，got it, thank you
DeleteHello Lucy.Your paragraph is very rich, if you add your own experience will be better. The structure of the article is good, the idea is very clear, keep it up.。
ReplyDeletegood suggestion. thx.
DeleteHi Lucy.
ReplyDeleteThat's a good paragraph. I like your paragraph. And you created it good. But I think you forgot to under line your main topic above. Thank you.
i will modify it. haha, thx.
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ReplyDeleteHi Lucy. Good job, but I think you too exited with content creation till you forgot to pay attention with the requirement in Writing from Within 2 page 7 as posted by Mr Emil in WhatsApp.
ReplyDeleteyeah、 i see. i will modify it. thx for your attention.
Deleteit is great lucy!, but maybe next time you should give more attention to the spelling, before you post you paragraph you can use automatic correction that provided, like for the word "travel", "journey" and so on :)
ReplyDeletethank u. kezia.
Delete
ReplyDeleteHi lucy, you did really great job. Here are my suggestions for you. First, I think you need to underline your main topic and subtopics as well. Secondly, I think you need to change "travling" to "traveling". Overall, I like your article and of course I'm looking forward to seeing your next article. Good job and keep it up :)
Its a good paragraph but dont forget to underline the main topic and the subtopics.The grammar is good! Good job
ReplyDeleteOKAY, THANK YOU!
Deleteit is very nice job. and if you give more case , it will be better.
ReplyDeleteThx for ur suggestions.
DeleteThe things about I like to do is traveling. Some one say that there must be at least two impluses in their lives. Once for the love, once said to go on a trip!
ReplyDeleteTravel is not a place to travel. Travel is not non-see people, but is in your inner voice. On the road, everything becomes simple, pure and natural.
Many people like traveling. They just feel happy when traveling. But not many people will think the meaning of travel. What is the meaning of travel? Actually, one of the meanings is to find happy. Putting aside all the trouble to enjoy themselves. Usually makes people happy. There is another important meaning that is to learn something. To go out for a visit can enlarge people's vision. People can learn a lot from it. Therefore, sometimes we will find that some people will be different after they return home from travel. It is the reason that we need to learn the true meaning of travel.
Above all, that is one of my favorite things to do.